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I hardly got within pistol shot of the place.

  Decked out as I was, I walked towards a cottage, from whose chimney smoke rose. However, I hardly got within pistol shot of the place before I found myself surrounded by a mob of completely naked men, who seemed surprised to see me.  I don't think they'd ever seen someone dressed in bottles, whose feet barely touched the ground; with my every movement, the dew in my remaining bottles caught the Sun's rays and made me bob up and down. Had I more of them, I am sure I'd have risen up into the air before them.  I would have spoken with them, but in a twinkling they were gone, like birds scattering among the trees. However, I caught one whose legs had doubtless failed his heart, and with a deal of difficulty - the forest was suffocating - I asked him how far we were from Paris, and since when the people of France went about in the total nude, and why he'd fled in such obvious terror?  He was an old, olive-skinned man, who sank before me and joined his hands behind his ...

Who dares affirm that our Collegiates are no Astrologers.

  A powder against the biting of mad dogs. Take of the leaves of Vervain, Rue, Sage, Plantain, Polypodium, Common Wormwood, Mint, Mugwort, Bawm, Bettony, St John's Wort, Centaury, of equal parts.  Let all be gathered at what time they are in their greatest strength, which is usually about the Full Moon in June*. Then, let them be dried severally in brown papers in such a place where neither Sun** nor rain comes; and when you have dried them, then keep them for the use above said, but upon this condition, that you renew them every year.  * Who dares affirm that our Collegiates are no Astrologers.  ** Learnedly written.  When you have need to use them, beat an equal weight of them into powder. A drachm of this powder is sufficient to take every morning.  Pleres Arconticon - Nich. Take of Cinnamon, Cloves, Galaga, wood of Aloes, Indian Spikenard, Nutmeg, Ginger, Spodium, Schoenanthus, Cyperus, Roses*, Violets, of each one drachm; Indian Leaf or Mace, Liquoris,...

It being out of the reach of a Vulgar Purse, I omit the Dose; let the Gentry and Nobility study Physick themselves.

  Latificans - ascribed to Galen. Take of the flowers of Clove Basil*or else the seeds thereof, Saffron, Zedoary, wood of Aloes, Cloves, Citron peel, Galanga, Mace, Nutmegs, Styrax, Calamitis, of each two drachms and a half; shavings of Ivory, Annis seeds, Thyme, Epithimum, of each one drachm; Bone of a Stag's Heart, Pearls, Camphire, Ambergris, Musk, of each a drachm; leaves of Gold and Silver, of each half a scruple. * I take that to be the greatest sort of Basil, called once before Ocinum Citratum, and here Caryophilatum, Citron, or Clove Basil. Beat them into powder according to art, and so keep them diligently for your use.  It causes a merry heart, a good colour; helps digestion, and keeps back old age.  You may mix half a drachm of it to take at one time, or less if you please, in any cordial syrup or cordial electuary appropriated to the same use. See Directions. Species Confectionis Liberantis.  Take of the roots of Tormentil and seeds of Sorrel, Endive, Cor...

I attached a Number of Vials to myself, full of Dew.

  This whimsy, which might seem a raging fever, gave way to the conviction that yes, I might actually make this trip. So, I shut myself away in a reasonably remote country house, and indulged my imagination.  This, then, is how I would travel through the heavens.  I attached a number of vials to myself, full of dew; these reacted to the Sun's rays, so violently that that heat drew them like a laden cloud high into the air. I found myself beyond our atmosphere, the middle region of the air. The power of this attraction made me rise rapidly, however, the higher I rose the further the Moon appeared, further even than it had appeared from my rooms; I broke some of my vials of dew, and floated back down to earth.  My inference was not mistaken, and I fell gently through the air and must make land, I reckoned, around midnight; however, when I touched the ground, the Sun was far above the horizon, and it must have been midday. You can imagine my shock; I knew not what to at...

I could tell Mr. Printer - if I dare be so bold - that he had more Tongue than Wit.

  Dipenidion - Nich. Take of Penidies, two ounces; Pinenuts, Sweet Almonds blanched, White Poppy seeds, of each three drams and one scruple; Cinnamon, Cloves, Ginger, juice of Liquoris, Gum Tragacanth and Arabic, White Starch, the Four Greater Cold Seeds husked, of each one dram and a half; Camphire, seven grains; White Sugar, so much as is sufficient. Make it into a powder, and with Syrup of Violets you may make it up in form of an electuary. I could tell Mr. Printer - if I dare be so bold - that he had more tongue than wit, when he made that Apology at the latter end of the College's masterpiece; for at the last sentence of this receipt, here are certain words left out, and amongst them the principal verb, which how gross an error it is, I leave to the consideration of every scholar who is able to translate a piece of Latin into English. It helps the vices of the breast, coughs, colds, hoarseness, and consumptions of the lungs, as also such as spit matter. You may mix it with any...

When asked what they were, they said they were men like air . . .

  Cyrano de Bergerac talks about a book by Gerolamo Cardano, in which he is visited by a pair of gentlemen from the Moon. Cardano is easily of the stature of Leibnitz and Newton; the list of his contributions is formidable, and Cyrano's citing him is like me today saying 'As Wolfgang Pauli himself noted'. Cardano wrote *a lot*, but likeliest place to look is De Subtilitate Rerum (1550). There is a liber on demonology, in which he describes something his father related: Verum omnibus historiis magis admirabilem hic subiiciam, quam non semel nec paucis vicibus audiui a patre meo, Facio Cardano, qui deaemonem se familiarem per xxx ferme annos habuisse confitebatur. But of all the stories I relate here, this which I heard not once not several times from my father, Facio Cardano, is more wonderful still. He confided he'd had a demonic familiar for almost thirty years . . . He goes on to describe his father being visited by seven spirits. Cum interrogarentur, quinam essent, ...

Here may you see what a Labyrinth the College have run themselves into through their Fantasticalness.

  Species Electuarii Diamagariton Calidi - Avicenna. Take of Pearls and Pellitory of the Wall, of each one drachm; Ginger, Mastic, of each half an ounce; Doronicum, Zedoary, Smallage seeds, both sorts of Cardomoms, Nutmegs, Mace, of each two drams; Been of both sorts - if they cannot be procured take the roots of Avens and Tormentil - and Black and Long Pepper, of each three drams; Cinnamon five drachms. Beat them into powder and keep them for your use. Avicenna prescribes this as an electuary, and so are all the College's powders prescribed by those whom they borrowed them as I told you before, and they will keep longer and better in electuaries than in powders, but people must be fantastical. This - quoth Avicenna - is appropriated to women, and in them to diseases incident to their matrix, but his reasons I know not. It is cordial, and heats the stomach. Species Electuarii Diamargariton Frigidi - Nich. Take of the four greater cold seeds cleansed the seeds of Purslain, White Pop...